On Joy and Sorrow

Sorry about the blog overload- I am near a computer and have lots of things I have been meaning to share. I've got a few more stories I am saving (i.e. cheese''burger'' misunderstanding, smashing my finger helping a woman carry her motorbike up the stairs at the train station), but I will not write them all now, becau0se I do not think that I can send more than 3 posts in a day without seeming desperate. Maybe I already passed the limit? Maybe.

However, this was neat and I wanted to share. I have made a wonderful friend here named Jani (short for Janez). We've had many a conversation about life... and I told him all about my favorite poem (On Joy and Sorrowby Kahlil Gibran) in English, before he realized that he had the same book in Slovene. Here it is, in Slovene:

O Veselju in Žalosti:
Nato mu poroče neka žena: Govori nam o Veselju in Žalosti.

In on je govoril:

Vaše veselje je vaša nezakrita žalost.
Isti vir, iz katerega se poraja vaš smeh, je bil mnogokrat napojen s solzami.
Je mar mogoče, da bi bilo drugače?
Kolikor globlje bo žalost presunila vaše bitje, toliko več veselja boste lahko zadržali.
Mar vašega vrča za vino ni žgal lončar v peči?
In lutnja, ki vam boža dušo, mar ni iz lesa, ki so ga izdolbli z noži?
Ko so veselite, poglejte globoko v svoje srce in spoznali boste, da vam prinaša veselje pravzaprav tisto, kar vam je zadalo bolest.
Ko se žalostite, si znova poglejte v srce in videli boste, da jočete za svojo slastjo.

Nekateri med vami pravijo: 'Veselje je večje od žalosti,' in drugi: 'Ne, žalost je večja.'
Jaz pa vam pravim, da sta neločjiva.
Skupaj prihajata in ko prvo samo prisede k vaši mizi, so spomnite, da druga spi v vaši postelji.

Kot tehtnica ste, razpeti med svojo žalost in svoje veselje.
Samo tedaj, ko sta vaši skodeli prazni, ste mirni in v ravnotežju.
Ko vas zakladničar vzdigne, da izmeri svoje zlato in srebro, bo vaša žalost ali vaše veselje poraslo ali padlo.


And I can sort of understand!
Well, 50%.

From One Who Knows Little About Music

In case you're interested, these songs have been delightful:

(would like to give a shout out to Travis Lindeman, who gave me most of this music)

1. 'This Side' by Nickel Creek. Beautiful.
2. 'Everybody Come Outside' by The Pomegranates. good song, plus pomegranates are called grenade apples here, which is wildly appropriate. Slovenia, +1
3. 'Life is Grand' by Old Canes. true.
4. 'If You Want' by Brent Berry Band. I have no choice but to include him. Plus, this song seems really appropriate sometimes
5. 'There Will be No Divorce' by The Mountain Goats I see mountain goats every day.
6. 'Worry About it Later' by Brakes Brakes Brakes. Aside from being a really great, upbeat song that I love to cycle to, the title is very comforting for me, especially now when i want to stop thinking about things.
7. 'At the Hop' by Devendra Banhart. Put me in your suitcase, let me help you pack. Cause you're never comin' back, no you're never comin' back.
8. 'W' by the Cave Singers. I think that I got the title wrong, but my computer is about to die... no time to look this up. good song though.
9. 'Nothing Better' by The Postal Service. mostly just love that I am not the most dramatic person that lives.
10. 'Yoshima' by The Flaming Lips. It's nice to be here, in a simple place :)
11. 'I Wanna Have Your Babies' by Natasha Bedingfield. not really. this is just a tribute to my roommates. However, if you have not watched this music video, i highly recommend it.
12. 'Fastcar' by Tracy Chapman. this one's for you jeff. good song.
13. 'Wheat Kings' by The Tragically Hip. Canadian band. Great song.
14. 'Bye Bye' by BBB

Some Might Call This A Bad Mistake. I Say, ''Blue is a nice color''.

So I turned all of the laundry blue today. This has never happened to me before, but now that I think about it, at my parent's house, I learned to separate everything into 16 loads (and let it be known, that my mother can remove ANY stain that ever has existed), and when I started throwing all of my laundry into the same washing machine (including cadaver clothes), it was at the Island house... where we cannot use the washing machine between 11pm and 8am, because it is impossible to sleep over the noise that it makes. The machine that we often sit on when it's empty, but cannot sit on while its working, because the risk of getting motion sickness is too great. The machine where even the "hot" water could be used to make ready-to-serve lemonade.

I figure, it's not such a big problem. Blue jeans are blue anyway... and it changed everything very consistently. There were a few striped shirts that are just darker... bandannas have more colors, white tanktops are a beautiful sky blue (side note: nothing was blue in the first place, making this a bit of an enigma).

If anything, I found a really cheap way to change your wardrobe. Just wash your clothes in Slovenia. If you have anything you would like altered, I would be happy to do everything in my power.

Katie, Tyler, Nick, You'd better start re-writing that song:

It's hard to believe that I've been gone a month- it feels like maybe 3 or 4 have gone past... and still, full classes have yet to begin...


Even though I've quickly been caught up in life here, I have still gotten a lot of time to think and process lifey-life things (that is for you, Barry... where ever you are). I am not going to post most of them on this blog, because I know that, as much as I secretly hope for it to be, my life is just not the most important thing in the world to you.

However, there are some changes that I have realized are occuring within me- things that I have always thought or anticipated are shifting a bit (mostly regarding life and plans but also ideas- if you want to know more, make an expensive phone call :) Or email...). And some are more signifiant than others... but one may influence you all:

I love babies.

WHAT?! Yeah, I know. I had this moment in Canada that most of you have probably had at some time, where I was holding this sweet little infant (!!! i know, i know), and she put her whole hand around my pinky, and I melted a little bit. And I get really excited to see Eva and Blaž's baby Tija. She is beautiful. She giggles all of the time and tried to eat my necklace (I guess she already has good taste, ehhh???). I love her. I even offered to babysit.

So, mom, Rachel, don't get too excited. That still doesn't mean I will have them for a long time, especially considering my social ineptness that boys refuse to see as 'charm'. And this, in No Way, Shape, or Form means that I am ok with watching any baby video on youtube. I will forever hate 'Charlie bit my finger', and believe strongly that the would be a better place if that video was destroyed.

can't think of a good enough name.

I am spent.


I have been going to "lektorat" for 2 weeks now... 3 hours a day, 3 or 4 days a week, just the instructor and I, speaking solely in Slovene. Doesn't sound too bad? Wrong. It's bad. My brain is mush afterward. After tutoring on Friday, I realized that I was just staring at intently at this insignificant sign (probably with my mouth open, and eyes partially closed), and I didn't know how long I'd been there. Then I looked at my watch, and class had ended 11 minutes ago. What?! 11 minutes of doing nothing but standing and watching a sign.

It is wonderful though, being able to semi-communicate with beloved people. It's also nice to be able to refuse food and have a slightly larger vocabulary (though even young people who can speak English give you the food pressure. For example, every time I eat with my roommates, Rok and Nejc and Jure, they too try to get me to continue eating. "Have more!" "Come on, eat, eat" "Nicole, there is plenty of food, have more!" They even did this on Thursday, "Nicole, please eat more." Why was this strange? I made lunch.).

I am trying to find energy- everyone is taking such great care of me. Jure is the most hospital roommate ever, and I have incredible friends here that never want me to be bored. The only problem is, I would not mind being bored for just a little while. :) Sometimes I go to the river to do my homework, and am truly relaxed. Maybe it's the gentle breeze brushing the hair against my shoulders, or the sun setting and bringing out the pink hues in the buildings, or the boats slowly moving past, or hearing the groups of people laugh, or smelling the cigarette smoke waft past (note: I have again been forced to take up second-hand smoking. jbh, maybe you should come and visit). Maybe it's just that I am sitting and can still feel the soreness in legs, or maybe it's the fact that I am not really doing my homework, but just thinking about these things and how nice they are as I listen to Brent Berry Band. As peaceful as it is here... Brent Berry makes me just a little homesick for Lawrence :)

Today too will be full. Full of eating and drinking (definitely), full of cycling (hopefully), full of studying (perhaps).

Would be happy for news of you... miss you all. love, n

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

I don't care if I am stabbing my country in the back. For the first time since the NCAA tournament, I watched a game and cared.

I weep with you, little Slovenija. You fought hard.

Germany!